This Sunday while sitting in church I was having some serious God moments. I can’t help but feel closer to the Lord when I’m surrounded by other followers worshiping just as I am. But I don’t have these God moments every week...God moments are times when I feel like He is talking directly to me or knocking on my door telling me to pay attention. These moments also don’t necessarily exclusively occur during church but this moment did. Even though Pastor JD was talking to everyone in the room I felt like God was specifically talking to me through him. As you all know (assuming you read my post before last) I’ve been struggling with control in my life, well throughout the week I’ve been praying and asking God to answer some of my questions on the subject and well He did through pastor JD’s sermon this week. I really wanted to make this post “Who’s in Control? 2.0” but I want to listen to the sermon again before writing my thoughts on it. I’m waiting for it to be posted to http://www.summitrdu.com/ (I’m providing the link in case you’re interested in listening before I have a chance to get my thoughts down).
So if this post isn’t “Who’s in Control? 2.0,” what is it? It’s on nutrition YAY!! No not yay...its another part of my life I constantly struggle with. I know your probably thinking “What is this girl’s problem? She looks fine” but its not that I’m overweight or underweight it’s what I’m consuming is just bad. Here is my typical diet:
Breakfast: Poptarts (chocolate, smores, or strawberry unfrosted), Orange juice (if its a good day and I’m not convinced its poisoning me)
Lunch: Peanut butter sandwich with nutella, chips—usually Doritos or salt and vinegar, string cheese, fiber one bar, fruit snacks (has to be the walmart brand)
Dinner: What’s that?
It’s bad...I’m not sure what kind of nutritional content I get from those things but it isn’t much and probably explains why my immune system hates me. I’ve gotten especially terrible with Dinner..I’ll feel hungry and I’ll make something but after cooking I just don’t feel like eating so I put it in the refrigerator for a day that never comes. It’s almost like I fill up on the smell...yeah I’m crazy and I know its not true because a few hours later I’ll eat something high in sugar or carbs (airheads, m&ms, cookies, or more chips) to settle my stomach enough to sleep.
I have very little variety in my diet...its sad the biggest variety lies with what flavor pop tart I choose or if I decide to go with grape jelly instead of nutella. I'm so incredibly picky when it comes to food. I eat like a 3 year old..it has to be normal in texture, plain, and sweet to taste.
Certain people in my life feel the need to constantly tell me I don’t eat right and I hate hearing all of the lectures...that might be why when I go to the doctors I skip the nutrition section of the paperwork. I just don’t want to hear it.
So what makes me want to change now? While browsing the bookstore the other day (I do this often for fun especially if they have a coffee shop) I came across this book called “Food, Fitness, and Faith for Women.” I picked it up because I haven’t thought about what my health means to God. If I want to live my life Christ-like then I need to do it in all areas of my life including taking care of myself.
Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
1 Corithians 6: 19-20
I’ve been quite familiar with this verse for some time now but I’ve always read it as God saying do not sin against your own body with sexual sin. Pretty much no sex until marriage! Ok got it...but I never considered eating crappy is also dishonoring my body aka God’s temple. Its not all the nagging from friends and family that make me want to change my diet but its the realization that I'm dishonoring God.
With God’s help I can do this! It started last night with instead of skipping dinner, which I would have been fine doing, I made chicken fajitas and I actually ate one! I also had some whole grain tortilla chips...yes thats right...brown chips...haha and to my surprise they actually tasted good and they’re better for me than they regular chips. Today for lunch instead of my usual peanut butter and nutella sandwich I’m having a turkey and salami sandwich on whole grain oatmeal bread...hopefully I’ll like it and if I don't I pray I'll grow to like it. I’m still eating my usual junk with my sandwich haha but baby steps right?? I’m going to get better :) I'm determined to eat healthier faithfully.
Well thats all for now...be on the look out for Control 2.0. I’m going on vacation this week but I haven’t decided if that means I’ll take a vacation from the blog as well. A long road trip might be conducive to thinking and writing. Pray for safe travels for my sister and I as we make our way to NY :)
Monday, June 20, 2011
Saturday, June 18, 2011
Just for fun--Not a typical Post
Trying to find a distraction...and this is what I came across. Not my typical post...just something to do. I really like "..." .... Also, before I start did you know I graduated from Carolina and still don't fully understand how to use a comma...haha Thank God for friends who edit my papers!
1. What time did you get up this morning?
5:45am . For those of you who work with me you know I hardly ever make it to work on time. So in order to make it in by 8 instead of 8:10 I met a coworker for coffee at 7. Yay for being responsible and making it to work on time!!
2. How do you like your steak?
I like it pink...not red
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?
I saw Something Borrowed with Cait a few weeks ago. It was pretty good.
3a. Favorite Movie?
Probably Benny and Joon
4. What is your favorite TV show?
Easiest question ever....Desperate Housewives. So many life lessons to be learned from that show!
5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?
Somewhere warm. I'm always cold.
6. What did you have for breakfast?
Iced Chai Tea Latte and a piece of chocolate chip banana nut bread from Starbucks. Yum!
7. What is your favorite cuisine?
Hmmm...thats difficult...American?? I’m not really sure
8. What foods do you dislike?
Oh don’t get me started....eggs, strawberries, beets, carrots, apples, spaghetti w/long noodles..pretty much anything healthy
9. Favorite Place to Eat?
I like Noodles and Chipotle
10. Favorite dressing?
Toss up between Ranch, Ceasar, and Italian...it depends on my mood
11.What kind of vehicle do you drive?
A tinkerbell car? Chevy Cavalier aka (bumper car)
12. What are your favorite clothes?
Dressy stuff especially shirts with ruffles
12a. Favorite Disney character?
If you do not know the answer to this...we are not friends. Just sayin.
13. Where would you visit if you had the chance?
Austrailia, New Zealand, Ireland...somewhere in the Carribean. I enjoy traveling.
14. Cup 1/2 empty or 1/2 full?
Depends on my mood and situation but I’d like to think I’m a ½ full kind of girl :)
15. Where would you want to retire?
Chapel Hill, NC....I like it here haha but who knows I may end up liking Fl better
16. Favorite time of day?
Morning...its when I’m most functional
17. Where were you born?
Jacksonville, North Carolina.
18. What is your favorite sport to watch?
Competitive cheerleading and UNC Basketball of course
(Questions 19-21 were either irrelevant or stupid so I chose not to include them)
22. Are you a morning person?
I think so.
23. Are you a leader or a follower?
Leader in Society, Follower of the Lord :)
24. Do you have any pets?
Kringle, he’s my cat...but he hates me...go figure
25. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share?
I share most of my current events in my blog...nothing too exciting right now. Excited for August to hurry up and get here. I’ve never wanted to rush a summer more than I do now.
26. What did you want to be when you were little?
A veterinarian or teacher. Typical. A guy at work told me he wanted to be a Janitor....who picks that as a kid?
27. What is your best childhood memory?
Playing silly games like hotel or hobo...yes I used to like to pretend I was homeless. Hahaha it was fun to build forts and stuff outside
28. Are you a cat or dog person?
Cats but I like small dogs too
29. Are you married?
No..
30. Always wear your seat belt?
ALWAYS. I won’t ride in anything with them. Well besides the bus but thats the only exception
31. Been in a car accident?
Hahahaa umm a few...have I mentioned that I’m a horrible driver?
32. Any pet peeves?
Dirty kitchen, confusing the difference between “to” and “too”
33. Favorite Pizza Toppings?
Pepperoni and jalapeƱo
34. Favorite Flower?
Pink roses
35. Favorite ice cream?
Half baked....mmm
36. Favorite fast food restaurant?
These questions are boring me.
37. How many times did you fail your drivers license test?
I bet you can guess...yes I failed the driving part once. I still can’t back up in a straight line.
38. From whom did you get your last email?
My mom or UF...I’m not sure. They both tend to flood my email box ;)
39. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?
Express or Apple
40. Done anything spontaneous lately?
No. I need help in this area of my life. I have to plan for everything, its rather daunting.
41. Like your job?
LOVE my job at Disney and Walgreens is okay too I guess...but love love Disney :)
42. Broccoli?
With cheese please
43. What was your favorite vacation?
I enjoy our time share in Atlantic Beach. Two things I like to do most during the summer are reading and tanning. I’m sad I’ll be missing out this year.
44. Last person you went out to dinner with?
Chris, Collins, and Justin...5 visits to food places in a single day..it may be a record for me
45. What are you listening to right now?
Made to Worship by Chris Tomlin is playing on my Pandora currently
46. What is your favorite color?
Pink!!
47. How many tattoos do you have?
One
48 is another silly question I’ll be skipping
49. Coffee Drinker?
On occasion but I prefer diet pepsi
50. What time did you finish this quiz?
12:00 am...yes exactly
1. What time did you get up this morning?
5:45am . For those of you who work with me you know I hardly ever make it to work on time. So in order to make it in by 8 instead of 8:10 I met a coworker for coffee at 7. Yay for being responsible and making it to work on time!!
2. How do you like your steak?
I like it pink...not red
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?
I saw Something Borrowed with Cait a few weeks ago. It was pretty good.
3a. Favorite Movie?
Probably Benny and Joon
4. What is your favorite TV show?
Easiest question ever....Desperate Housewives. So many life lessons to be learned from that show!
5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?
Somewhere warm. I'm always cold.
6. What did you have for breakfast?
Iced Chai Tea Latte and a piece of chocolate chip banana nut bread from Starbucks. Yum!
7. What is your favorite cuisine?
Hmmm...thats difficult...American?? I’m not really sure
8. What foods do you dislike?
Oh don’t get me started....eggs, strawberries, beets, carrots, apples, spaghetti w/long noodles..pretty much anything healthy
9. Favorite Place to Eat?
I like Noodles and Chipotle
10. Favorite dressing?
Toss up between Ranch, Ceasar, and Italian...it depends on my mood
11.What kind of vehicle do you drive?
A tinkerbell car? Chevy Cavalier aka (bumper car)
12. What are your favorite clothes?
Dressy stuff especially shirts with ruffles
12a. Favorite Disney character?
If you do not know the answer to this...we are not friends. Just sayin.
13. Where would you visit if you had the chance?
Austrailia, New Zealand, Ireland...somewhere in the Carribean. I enjoy traveling.
14. Cup 1/2 empty or 1/2 full?
Depends on my mood and situation but I’d like to think I’m a ½ full kind of girl :)
15. Where would you want to retire?
Chapel Hill, NC....I like it here haha but who knows I may end up liking Fl better
16. Favorite time of day?
Morning...its when I’m most functional
17. Where were you born?
Jacksonville, North Carolina.
18. What is your favorite sport to watch?
Competitive cheerleading and UNC Basketball of course
(Questions 19-21 were either irrelevant or stupid so I chose not to include them)
22. Are you a morning person?
I think so.
23. Are you a leader or a follower?
Leader in Society, Follower of the Lord :)
24. Do you have any pets?
Kringle, he’s my cat...but he hates me...go figure
25. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share?
I share most of my current events in my blog...nothing too exciting right now. Excited for August to hurry up and get here. I’ve never wanted to rush a summer more than I do now.
26. What did you want to be when you were little?
A veterinarian or teacher. Typical. A guy at work told me he wanted to be a Janitor....who picks that as a kid?
27. What is your best childhood memory?
Playing silly games like hotel or hobo...yes I used to like to pretend I was homeless. Hahaha it was fun to build forts and stuff outside
28. Are you a cat or dog person?
Cats but I like small dogs too
29. Are you married?
No..
30. Always wear your seat belt?
ALWAYS. I won’t ride in anything with them. Well besides the bus but thats the only exception
31. Been in a car accident?
Hahahaa umm a few...have I mentioned that I’m a horrible driver?
32. Any pet peeves?
Dirty kitchen, confusing the difference between “to” and “too”
33. Favorite Pizza Toppings?
Pepperoni and jalapeƱo
34. Favorite Flower?
Pink roses
35. Favorite ice cream?
Half baked....mmm
36. Favorite fast food restaurant?
These questions are boring me.
37. How many times did you fail your drivers license test?
I bet you can guess...yes I failed the driving part once. I still can’t back up in a straight line.
38. From whom did you get your last email?
My mom or UF...I’m not sure. They both tend to flood my email box ;)
39. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?
Express or Apple
40. Done anything spontaneous lately?
No. I need help in this area of my life. I have to plan for everything, its rather daunting.
41. Like your job?
LOVE my job at Disney and Walgreens is okay too I guess...but love love Disney :)
42. Broccoli?
With cheese please
43. What was your favorite vacation?
I enjoy our time share in Atlantic Beach. Two things I like to do most during the summer are reading and tanning. I’m sad I’ll be missing out this year.
44. Last person you went out to dinner with?
Chris, Collins, and Justin...5 visits to food places in a single day..it may be a record for me
45. What are you listening to right now?
Made to Worship by Chris Tomlin is playing on my Pandora currently
46. What is your favorite color?
Pink!!
47. How many tattoos do you have?
One
48 is another silly question I’ll be skipping
49. Coffee Drinker?
On occasion but I prefer diet pepsi
50. What time did you finish this quiz?
12:00 am...yes exactly
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Who's in control?
Now that I’ve finished my puzzle I’m back to blogging more frequently. You know you’ve missed me ;) and if you haven’t well then I guess send me another puzzle? Haha
The other day at work they called me Napoleon insinuating that I have a “Napoleon complex” or control issues. I must confess I can be controlling at times. I’m thankful that I’m friends with my coworkers and know that they love me or I’d be afraid they disliked me for my control issues. I’ve never really liked group work either. I always felt obligated to do most of the work as I couldn’t control the effort my fellow group members put into the project at stake. It sounds bad but it’s true. I think I might find some security in being in control I’m not sure...all I know is I don’t like it when I don’t feel in control. I’m telling you all this because I’m not okay with it. I don’t like being called Napoleon even if it is a joke, it makes me sad. But at the same time I’m glad it came up because it made me think of who is in control of my life...me or God.
Life is a road of trials and tribulations that are only manageable when God is in the driver seat. If we do not give Him the wheel we are bound to crash.
Some people say we make our own life choices and then God blesses them but what if God makes choices for us and we are supposed to choose and carry out those choices? How do I know that I’m giving Him control and making the right choices now? I can’t see what He sees. This is where a lot of my uncertainty lies...
How do I know that I’ve chosen the right career path? What if somewhere along the way my “control issues” interfered with God’s plan? I’m nervous that once I start classes that it’ll be too difficult. I’m afraid I might fail because it’s not what He had chosen for me but what I chose for myself.
Not giving God control explains all of my failed attempts to find a good guy. Every time I think I’ve found someone great they turn out not to be so great. Or at least not great for me. I probably wouldn’t have gotten so close to them if I would have given God the wheel for 5 minutes. How will I know if the next guy I fall for is in God’s plan for Samantha or in my plan for Samantha?
We are supposed to give total control to our Lord as He knows us better than we know ourselves and only His way is the perfect way. When we interfere and take control we are left with the feeling “What am I doing wrong?” because no matter what we do nothing seems to work out right. I think I’ve said this before, but what I think is best for me may not be what He KNOWS is best for me. I’m afraid I haven’t given Him total control...I want to but not sure how. How do you know when you’ve given total control to Him? Although I wish it could, I don’t think this question can be answered in a “How to follow God for Dummies” kind of book. Haha... I know there is no formulaic answer to this question but if you have some insight please speak up.
Dear Lord, Please teach me how to give you control of the wheel that is my life. Everyone knows that I’m a bad driver and I’m tired of crashing into things...Amen
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Here Goes Nothing
I’m meeting a friend for coffee in exactly 7 hrs and 56 minutes so I better make this quick. I want some sleep before then.
Here Goes (click here to listen) Right click to open in new tab/window
“Never got anywhere by running away
Never learned anything without a mistake
Never loved anyone by playing it safe
It's a long way down, but I'm here right now...so
Here goes nothing, here goes everything
Gotta reach for something or you'll fall for anything
Take a breath, take a step, what comes next God only knows
But here goes
I don't wanna turn around and wonder what happened
Never lost and never found are one in the same
I wanna run across the battle lines and take my chances
Not the long way 'round when I'm here right now...so
Here goes nothing, here goes everything
Gotta reach for something or you'll fall for anything
Take a breath, take a step, what comes next God only knows
But here goes
What good is chance not taken?
What good is life not living ?
What good is love not given?
Here goes nothing, here goes everything
Gotta reach for something or you'll fall for anything”
Sometimes my posts are about Disney, sometimes they are about faith, sometimes they’re like diary entries, and some, for example this one, are based on songs. The song Here Goes by Bebo Norman has been my theme song lately.
Today at work I was playing with a “Magic UNC Ball” it’s very similar to a Magic 8 ball and was wondering what it would be like to live my life by a Magic ball. I thought about trying it out for a few days... you know shaking the ball before making any decision and doing what it says. Living a life by 100% chance via a Magic 8 ball is irrational and would probably turn disastrous.
Me: “Should I go to work today?”...ball: “my reply is no”—outcome: lose my job.
Me: “Is it acceptable to not shower today?”...ball: “yes, definitely”---outcome: I’ll smell bad.
Me: “Is it okay to act irrationally?” Ball: “Cannot predict now”---outcome: that doesn’t tell me anything *shake again for better answer*
I forgot where I was going with this...or maybe I’m not sure where I’m going with this...
We’re supposed to use our brains to make logical decisions to avoid making stupid ones, but isn’t it okay to be irrational at times? I feel like if everyone acted rationally all of the time this would be a boring world. We need to take chances...step out of the comfort zone. However, we shouldn’t live our lives completely on chance like a magic 8 ball but instead take calculated risks. Risks were willing to accept the outcome no matter what happens..good or bad, easy or difficult. Sometimes I wish I could see my life the way God does...then I’d be more certain about the future and more certain about the decisions I’m making now. But I can’t, so I have to take chances..take risks...calculated risks. Most times rational decisions are the best ones however on occasion irrational ones turn out to be okay too...If we don’t take a chance we might miss what we’re looking for...
Here goes nothing...
Here Goes (click here to listen) Right click to open in new tab/window
“Never got anywhere by running away
Never learned anything without a mistake
Never loved anyone by playing it safe
It's a long way down, but I'm here right now...so
Here goes nothing, here goes everything
Gotta reach for something or you'll fall for anything
Take a breath, take a step, what comes next God only knows
But here goes
I don't wanna turn around and wonder what happened
Never lost and never found are one in the same
I wanna run across the battle lines and take my chances
Not the long way 'round when I'm here right now...so
Here goes nothing, here goes everything
Gotta reach for something or you'll fall for anything
Take a breath, take a step, what comes next God only knows
But here goes
What good is chance not taken?
What good is life not living ?
What good is love not given?
Here goes nothing, here goes everything
Gotta reach for something or you'll fall for anything”
Sometimes my posts are about Disney, sometimes they are about faith, sometimes they’re like diary entries, and some, for example this one, are based on songs. The song Here Goes by Bebo Norman has been my theme song lately.
Today at work I was playing with a “Magic UNC Ball” it’s very similar to a Magic 8 ball and was wondering what it would be like to live my life by a Magic ball. I thought about trying it out for a few days... you know shaking the ball before making any decision and doing what it says. Living a life by 100% chance via a Magic 8 ball is irrational and would probably turn disastrous.
Me: “Should I go to work today?”...ball: “my reply is no”—outcome: lose my job.
Me: “Is it acceptable to not shower today?”...ball: “yes, definitely”---outcome: I’ll smell bad.
Me: “Is it okay to act irrationally?” Ball: “Cannot predict now”---outcome: that doesn’t tell me anything *shake again for better answer*
I forgot where I was going with this...or maybe I’m not sure where I’m going with this...
We’re supposed to use our brains to make logical decisions to avoid making stupid ones, but isn’t it okay to be irrational at times? I feel like if everyone acted rationally all of the time this would be a boring world. We need to take chances...step out of the comfort zone. However, we shouldn’t live our lives completely on chance like a magic 8 ball but instead take calculated risks. Risks were willing to accept the outcome no matter what happens..good or bad, easy or difficult. Sometimes I wish I could see my life the way God does...then I’d be more certain about the future and more certain about the decisions I’m making now. But I can’t, so I have to take chances..take risks...calculated risks. Most times rational decisions are the best ones however on occasion irrational ones turn out to be okay too...If we don’t take a chance we might miss what we’re looking for...
Here goes nothing...
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