Friday, July 1, 2011

Home is Where the Heart is

Well hellloooo again..I’m not doing a very good job at keeping up with this am I? I’ve been doing a lot more of reading of blogs...well reading in general than posting. It’s the writing part that slows me down haha. If you ask me I’m much more of a math science kind of girl. I assure you if I could teleport my thoughts from my head to this blog there’d be a whole lot more posts but I can’ I post when I’m in the mood.

So it’s about that time pack up and move. Ugh I’m dreading it. It’s not just the exhausting packing and unpacking that I’m dreading but it’s the move in general. As time gets closer the less I want to go. This blows my mind and here’s why...The past few months I’ve been drowning myself in stuff to make time pass quicker. I read a ton, blog, work extra hours, and go to the gym..At first I even tried to avoid making new friends, I mean what was the point I knew I’d be leaving again soon...I keep a regular routine, I do practically the same thing every week just waiting for time to pass by so I can hurry up and get back to Florida. Why? I am so excited and anxious to get back into school and, I miss Disney. I miss being able to wear my Mickey shoes without getting weird glances, I miss walking down main street eating Mickey supreme bars as fast as I can before it melts, I miss being able to ride rollercoasters whenever I become bored. So you get the point..I’ve been doing everything in my power to make time fly by so I can get back to Florida. But now all of a sudden I’m digging my heels in the sand trying to slow down? It doesn’t make sense. I’m seriously going to miss Chapel Hill and all of the new people I’ve become close to over the past 6 months. I’m going to miss spring time in the quad, all of the inside jokes, good jobs, high fives and misc escapades with people from work. Now with only a few weeks left I’m begging for more time. I really feel like I don’t want to leave.

I can remember feeling the exact same way when I left Chapel Hill for the first time, however when I got to Disney I was fine. I missed everyone but it didn’t hurt nearly as much as I imagined. Then after a few months I wanted to go back to Chapel Hill so I went for a visit and right away wanted to go back to Florida and when it came time to leave I protested like never before. I can remember crying because I really just didn’t want to come home. I wanted to extend my college program and stay but I couldn’t I had obligations in Chapel Hill and had to finish some things for grad school so against my liking I returned.

You see the pattern? No matter where I live I’m never satisfied...something always seems to be missing. I think I’ll get that “home sweet home feeling” if I just go to the place I miss most but once I get there I’m ready to move again. This was very frustrating to me until I figured it out just recently. As I mentioned earlier I’ve been doing a lot of reading lately and the latest book I’ve completed is “Heaven is for Real” by Todd Burpo. First off what an amazing book! I highly recommend’s an easy read, I read it in less than 8 hours because I just couldn’t put it down. It’s about a little boy’s journey to heaven and back. After reading it I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about Heaven and what it’s like. That’s when I figured it out... Heaven is Home...these places here are only my temporary earthly residences. I’ll never experience that complete “home sweet home” feeling until I’m reunited with my heavenly Father. They say home is where the heart is; well my heart is with Him so I’ll never be Home-Home until I reach His kingdom. Thinking about it like this makes moving a whole lot easier. I know He has a plan for me and right now that plan is leading me away from Chapel Hill. It may hurt right now but I’ll be ok once I get there. God’s with me comforting me when I feel homesick. I’m also hoping this realization will keep me from wanting to move every time I feel like I miss a place. I can stop searching for a feeling I’ll never find here. I do want to settle in one place eventually and limit everywhere else to visits.

I don’t know what the geography in Heaven is like but I’m praying that Disney World and North Carolina are located walking distance from each other...hahaha.  Just maybe Disney will be located in the middle of Carolina's Arboretum?  If Disney World is the happiest place on Earth just imagine what it’s like in Heaven!! I bet the lines will be shorter and the Mickey Supreme bars won’t melt as quickly ;) oh and less protein spills too!

(I purposefully left out my future career in audiology from my picture of Heaven. In Heaven I don’t think anyone will need help with hearing but I’m sure people will still want to play in Disney..haha)



Elizabeth said...

I would so wear those shoes in public. They're spectacular.

Alison Miller said...

This was a beautiful post. Thanks for sharing this. :)

PS - I LOVED Heaven is for Real. My daughter read it in a day too. Amazing story.

Best wishes in Florida! I'm going to try to be better about keeping up with blogs! I love yours. :)

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